This is a recording from JQT Dying & Death, which took place on February 25, 2024 at the Celebration Hall in Mountain View Cemetery. Closed Captioning available.
JQT Dying & Death - Sunday, February 25, 2024 @ 1-3PM at Celebration Hall, Mountain View Cemetery
Join us for a townhall conversation on the status of Jewish queer trans dying and death services in BC. This is an opportunity to explore commonality and find ways to fill gaps. Come to learn, bring your questions and voice your ideas. This hybrid event (in-person and virtual attendance) will be hosted by the JQT Seniors Initiative, and everyone is welcome, including those who are involved with Chevrah Kadisha (Jewish burial societies), synagogues, care and end-of-life services, funerals and burials. The goal of this community gathering is to provide a platform for the JQT community to find out what is and is not yet possible in BC in 2024, and to build bridges between various groups that are working towards making dying and death more inclusive for our community at large. We invite these groups to give a quick presentation to inform our community.
Registration to attend and to present is free but required in advance. Only registrants who indicate that they will be attending virtually will receive the Zoom link. Light vegetarian food and refreshments will be provided. Click here to register.
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A message about changing the event name from "JQT Death Cafe" to "JQT Dying & Death":
We believe in the importance of safe spaces for the JQT community to talk about dying and death. We have received feedback that the concept of "Death Cafe" may not be known to everyone in our community. For context, a Death Cafe is a model of hosting an event that brings people together to discuss death and dying over food and tea. More info can be found with a quick Google search.
We want to treat this topic with the utmost respect. Given the concerns brought to us and in light of the pain our communities are feeling right now, we have opted to change the event name to "JQT Dying & Death". We know this topic is at top of mind for queer trans Jews of all ages (as death can happen any time), as well as for any Jews who are memberless of a synagogue, are in mixed relationships, and/or would like to know what is and is not available to them in BC at this time... when the time does come inevitably.
We encourage all participants to come to this event with open hearts, and for those with relevant experience, to give a short 5-min presentation, so we can build bridges and find solutions (even temporary ones) to issues regarding dying and death as queer trans Jews to reduce their weight on our community's mental health. To maximize comfort, please wear comfortable clothing, bring a tush pillow, perhaps even a pair of slippers, a cozy blanket, and enjoy the full bagel spread.
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This is the second event in our JQT Mental Health Support Series, which was developed in partnership with JFS Vancouver, following the Twice Blessed 2.0: The Jewish LGBTQ2SIA+ Initiative’s community needs assessment, which identified a critical service gap: Call to Action #6 - Develop and provide funding for LGBTQ2SIA+ friendly Jewish mental health support.
This gathering also addresses: Call to Action #2 - Develop inclusive care services for Jewish LGBTQ2SIA+ seniors and Call to Action #3 - Ensure that senior care home intake adequately assesses the needs of LGBTQ2SIA+ residents.
For the most up-to-date details on this series, please visit: https://www.jqtvancouver.ca/jqt-mental-health
Donation - If you are in a position to make a financial contribution towards the JQT Mental Health Support Series, visit the JFS Vancouver donation page and select the "JQT Mental Health" as your designated program. Your tax receipt will be sent to the provided email address.
Covid policy - JQT strictly follows the recommendations of Vancouver Coastal Health and makes decisions accordingly. Mask wearing is optional, but encouraged in group settings and to protect those in our circles who are immunocompromised.
Accessibility info - The official address of Celebration Hall is 5445 Fraser Street. Access to the site is from Fraser Street at 39th Avenue. Parking is available on the opposite side of the road adjacent to the Celebration Hall, in the parking area near the Operations Yard and on the side of other internal cemetery roads. The space is fully wheelchair accessible.
MEET YOUR HOST
Lisa Cohen Quay, RSW, MSW, MPA, is a registered social worker with 30 years experience working with older adults and their families in various community settings in the US and Canada. She coordinates Adult Programs at the Vancouver Jewish Community Centre and is a founding member of the JQT Seniors Initiative. She was a founding member of The Final Acts Project in Texas, a non-profit community-based health education initiative that used theatre and creative arts as a catalyst to stimulate end of life discussions, planning and legacy building, and which included hosting death cafe events.
The JQT Seniors Initiative is a Community Response Network of Jewish, LGBTQ+ and seniors healthcare organizations, addressing senior social isolation and loneliness in our communities, as well as the fear of going back into the closet and/or hiding one’s religious and cultural identities upon entering Assisted Living and Long Term Care in BC. The initiative recently launched the BC Jewish Queer & Trans Seniors Resource Guide, available at www.jqtvancouver.ca/jqt-seniors-initiative
PARTICIPANT FEEDBACK
“1) Felt so much more grounded in what to expect and not expect in the Jewish traditions we might wish to adhere to, during this time in our lives or the lives of loved ones
2) A lot of relief for me personally. I didn't think if I wanted a Jewish burial, I'd be included in the usual traditions through Schara Tzedek. I now feel confident I will be included in being taken care of with dignity and respect.
3) There is some room for the usual Jewish institutions to get some feedback and or training on how to be more inclusive. I appreciate their efforts, but I feel they may need to work a bit more on signalling to the trans and queer Jewish community that we are welcome.”
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“Presenters provided vital information about current burial services and support available to queer and trans Jews and their families. This enabled partipants to identify gaps, and make suggestions about how to close some of them.
Discussion about "inclusion" made clear the need for education/training. A common misconception is that inclusion means treating everyone the same; but this ignores the very real differences that, when not addressed, can lead to exclusion and other negative impacts.
This event was very well organized and facilitated, allowing for honesty and openness within a respectful and heartful environment.”
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“The people who created the resources did an excellent job, the presenters… relayed essential information…by advising the group that these "death items" need to be started when young and up-dated regularly. Things change over time and up-dates are essential.”
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“A milestone conversation for our community! Looking forward to seeing what changes will come from this townhall’s learnings”
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“Amazing and transformative JQT event… that brought together so many important voices to talk about the dying and death needs of Jewish LGBTQ+ community”